Did this thing shrink?
. . . More about Lola
The only thing more fun than owning a pet is to brag about their beauty and accomplishments, show off their funny pictures, and read some of the humorous jokes and quotes written about our favorite animals.
A man was driving through west Texas one evening. The road was deserted and he had not seen a soul for hours. Suddenly his car started to cough and the engine died, leaving him sitting on the side of the road in total isolation. He popped the hood and looked to see if there was anything that he could do to get it going again. As he stood looking at the gradually fading light of his flashlight, he cursed that he had not put in new batteries.
Suddenly, through the inky shadows, came a deep voice: "It's your fuel pump."
"Who said that?" the man called out.
There were two horses, a white one and a black one, standing in the fenced field alongside the road. The man was amazed when the white horse repeated, "It's your fuel pump. Tap it with your flashlight and try it again."
Confused, the man tapped the fuel pump with his flash light, turned the key and sure enough, the engine roared to life. He muttered a short thanks to the horse and screeched away.
When he reached the next town, he ran into the local bar. "Gimme a large whiskey, please!" he said.
A rancher sitting at the bar looked at the man's ashen face and asked, "What's wrong, man? You look like you've seen a ghost."
"It's unbelievable," the man said and recalled the whole tale to the rancher.
The rancher took a sip of his beer and looked thoughtful. "A horse, you say? Was it by any chance a white horse?"
"Yes, it was!" the man said, finally happy someone understood. "Am I crazy?"
"No, you ain't crazy. In fact, you're lucky," said the rancher, "because that black horse don't know nothin' about cars."
This wonderful photo is from suzaku_ekb's journal, which, unfortunately, is entirely in Russian. She takes excellent photographs!
If a rooster laid an egg on the roof of a house, which way would the egg roll?
Roosters don't lay eggs.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer!
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a duck?
A bird that lays down.
What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?
Deviled eggs.
Where do tough chickens come from?
From hard-boiled eggs.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn't what he was cracked up to be.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
Why did the chicken cross the beach?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the opossum it could be done.
Why did the chicken lay an egg?
Because if she dropped it, it would break.
Why didn't the hens fight?
They were too chicken.
This wonderful photo is from suzaku_ekb's journal, which, unfortunately, is entirely in Russian. She takes excellent photographs!
After the egg hunt on Easter Sunday, the young farm boy decided to play a prank. He went to the chicken coop and replaced every single egg with a brightly colored one.
A few minutes later the rooster walked in, saw all the colored eggs, then stormed outside and beat up the peacock!
(via)
Posted by FUNNY PETS at 8:17 AM 1 comments
Labels: albino animals, animals, funny picture collection, white animals